Another Women’s History Month is upon us, and while women nationwide are still reeling from the 140,000 jobs lost during the pandemic in December alone, we now have a chance to cherish all that women do for our collective society. Since early on in our short history as cognizant beings on this planet, women have been devalued and stripped of acknowledgement of even the most subjectively “small” accomplishments. As I have grown in my generation, I have witnessed a plethora of budding opportunists take advantage of or even begin to rewrite stereotypes to defy typical gender normalities. These brave, groundbreaking women are the ones most deserving of the spotlight at the moment and hold the key to a truly beautiful, and bountiful future.
Growing up in Sacramento I was raised primarily by my mother. Despite having a complete family my father would often spend weeks at a time at his office near San Francisco. My mother was a true matriarch; strong and confident, but unafraid to show her emotions. She instilled an excess of values and beliefs in me from early on leading me to become (what I believe and hope myself to be) the open minded, loving human being I am today. The endless sacrifices, sleepless nights, and unabashed honesty made me wonder … “How is this woman so damn strong?” As with most acclaimed stories, an awakening occurred in my mother a long time ago, a conflict that many women this day and age have been afflicted by.
My mother was born in Norwich, Connecticut by my grandmother who was completely too young to be having kids, already a teenage mother, a traditional catholic school girl as well. My grandfather Victor, a notorious philanderer in the area had an affair with my grandmother. Both were wed at 17, and the struggles that arise within teenage marriages can and will be exponentially magnified when extra marital affairs are involved. Both went their separate ways and my mother, a product of this affair, grew up in a very confused realm. She was raised by her grandparents for several years while her mother was getting settled with her new husband in Louisiana. Moving from Connecticut to Sikes, Louisiana my mother experienced complete culture shock, beginning to unravel any semblance of normalcy left in her life.
Sikes was a town lost in time, a place where it was completely accepted to have a kid on your hip at 15 years old. Graduating high school was considered a major accomplishment and the young women were complacent with being stay at home mothers. My mother knew that she had to make education her priority to escape this chasm lacking opportunity. She received Pell grants and student loans to attend college at Northwestern State where she began to witness how much diversity was truly lacking from the small town of 200 in Sikes. She references a Mark Twain quote that summarizes her isolation, “Travel is fatal to prejudice, bigotry, and narrow-mindedness, and many of our people need it sorely on these accounts.” She continues saying the more people you continue to meet throughout your life the more your views on how oppressive our reality is will continue to evolve.
Like many women today my mother was once faced with this choice: remain complacent with your standing in life or utilize all of your resources to break through glass ceilings, raising your daughters, (and all of your kids) with the notion that they can succeed despite any and all circumstances. Her key to this: supporting what occurs innately, empowering, and never stifling a child’s concerns or wishes. In my short time on Earth, I have considered myself lucky to have been surrounded by women who share these similar values, those unselfishly seeking grander moments for our future generations. However, it is heartbreaking to personally witness all of the strife and abuse women have to endure to have equal opportunity despite all of the advancements we have made as a collective society.
For example, just last week Crystal Jackson, a California mother, made waves in the news when it was reported that her three sons had been expelled from Sacred Heart Parish School in Sacramento due to her incredibly profitable OnlyFans account. She was reported by a fellow mother at the school, a paying subscriber who ruthlessly screenshotted and passed around her content to mock, and shame her. I thought it disgusting that this mother who began the OnlyFans account after experiencing marital troubles was now in hot water, yet her children were facing the brunt of all of the consequences. Some commenters voiced support stating “Leave them alone. The kids probably never would have known if it hadn’t become such a big deal.” However much like Sikes, Louisiana the “small town,” mindset still lives and breathes with one detractor stating “A Catholic school isn’t just a school. That’s why they want to send their kids there because it is a community of people that come together for the shared values. If you don’t share those values, and you were actively trying to undermine them, I feel like it’s only fair you were asked to leave.”
This spoke highly to me about how far we have to go as a collective society to dissolve these prejudices and “norms” surrounding women and all respective genders. As taught in basic biology, there are niches within populations that directly lead to a comfortable and satisfying life. Like my mother once taught herself, I adamantly believe that education and the ability to maintain an open mind will behoove all of our future generations in their pursuits of gratification and happiness. Every gender on this planet’s face helps comprise our very diverse, unique society, and through uplifting and inspiring, we can continue to evolve into an ideal world. Suppose we come together as a human race. In that case, we can disband these prejudices that hold individuals of all genders back and set ourselves up for a future where your gender does not determine your status and ability to create a truly fulfilling life.
